Written on March 2nd, 2009 at 12:03 am by Darren Rowse
Bloggers Without Boundaries: Are the Lines Getting Too Blurred?
In this post Jonathan Fields from the Career Renegade Blog and author of the book Career Renegade talks boundaries.
It’s Sunday morning, you’re up early, the house is still quiet. And, like any self-respecting blogger, you take this time to meditate, set-up your day and plan what you’ll do with the family, today. Not!
That’s what you know you should do. But, instead, you wander over to your computer, check your blog for comments, check your subscriber and traffic stats and maybe crank out a quick post or video. Then, you jump on twitter to check your timeline, follower numbers and reply to any @’s or dm’s.
A few minutes later, the kids wander out and your day really begins. Breakfast, then the day’s activities. It’s all great fun, yet, you still find yourself reveling in those random moments in the rest-room, where you linger a few extra seconds to check your e-mail, IM, twitter and stats once more on your trusty iPhone.
Congrats!
You’ve become a card-carrying member of Bloggers Without Boundaries.
You’ve lost the ability to separate your virtual community from your real-life community. And, in fact, what happens in the ether, for you, may play an equally important and impactful role in your life as what happens in flesh and blood.
Question is…to what end?
No doubt, the line between social media and socializing has become hopelessly blurred for many. I’m sure I am not alone in counting a number of twitter and blogging relationships among my “real” friends. In fact, I speak with certain online friends far more often than I speak with other face-to-face friends.
In the thick of this social media wild west, the rules are literally being made up as we go.
Along with the rapid fire commingling of online business and online friendships comes the near total evaporation of the “time” lines that separate family time and work time.
Add to that the ubiquity of smartphones with apps that give instant access to social media wherever you go. And, many bloggers end up blogging, tweeting, e-mailing and IMing seven-days a week, often sneaking it in with smartphone-driven mircobursts.
All of which makes me wonder…
“What’s the net effect on our humanity and ability to maintain intelligent boundaries between work, play, family and friends?”
Has the expectation now become that bloggers and social media marauders are available 24/7? For people like us, is there such a thing as a fixed workweek or office hours anymore?
Is social media the new Crackberry?
Has the ability to micro-burst a small bit of work by smartphone become an ever-present intrusion on personal and family time? Or, has it allowed those of us who work largely online to take immediate action on something that, a few years ago, would’ve been spinning in our heads for hours until we could find the nearest computer or returned to our offices, and given us the ability to be more genuinely present between the offending digital distractions?
Put another way, is this technologically-driven blurring of the lines between work and play and time spent in each a good thing, a bad thing…or just a thing?
Curious what your thoughts are. Let me know in the comments below…
————
Jonathan Fields is the author of the new book, Career Renegade. He also writes Awake@TheWheel and CareerRenegade.com and produces Career Renegade TV and the weekly Renegade Profiles podcast series.
86 Responses to “Bloggers Without Boundaries: Are the Lines Getting Too Blurred?” - Add Yours
Steven-Sanders
March 2nd, 2009 12:42 am
Awesome post! I think for some it does get in the way of family and such, but for others it may even help bring the family together.
Both my wife & I blog and use social media. It’s our time together most days.
Sometimes, when we’re not online, we’ll sit and talk about what’s going on here, or what’s happen to that person, but it’s not people in real life we’re talking about, it’s people and events online.
I think in a lot of ways, it has replaced the time when the husband and wife talk about how their day at work went. The topic has just shifted.
And depending on how your family is emerged into this blogging and social media revolution, it has potential to be both a good thing or a bad thing.
Derek
March 2nd, 2009 12:54 am
While I understand your concern John, I think the whole point of Social Media is to tear down the boundaries between regular family and friendships. Social Media is a tool that should both help your business and help you maintain healthy relationships with friends.
For example, just think about Facebook for a second. How many people have you contacted from your past just because of Facebook? I know I’ve contacted at least a hundred.
So, in some cases, I can see how the boundaries are gone, but as long as you’re using the tools the right way, it should be helping you along.
John Lampard
March 2nd, 2009 12:54 am
“For people like us, is there such a thing as a fixed workweek or office hours anymore?” No, there isn’t, is there? Go back 10/15 years, the world was nothing like it is today. Having said that I’d hate to have been living 100 years ago.
Pamela Slim
March 2nd, 2009 12:57 am
Nice to see you on Copyblogger Jonathan, my “internet friend” whom I will soon see in person at SXSW.
You must have been reading my mind. The other morning, I knew my line was crossed when, as I was busily catching up on Tweets and DMs and emails and blog comments, my 17-month old daughter walked up to me carrying her diaper box.
There I saw the line between Crack Mama and Social Media Mama was very thin.
It is important to draw boundaries. I am going to be more conscious of turning OFF my laptop when with my kids, since the “halfway there” state is not good for any of us.
Now I am going to get back to work on this Sunday morning so I can re-join my family downstairs.
:)
-Pam
Cristhian Bedon
March 2nd, 2009 12:58 am
This is true, some people tend to pull allnighters just to see if stats changed. People need to go outsie breathe in some fresh area, and let their blog throw in of it own work. You don’t want to just be stuck in the computer so than you close yourself in.
kelli Busey
March 2nd, 2009 12:59 am
“….is this technologically-driven blurring of the lines between work and play and time spent in each a good thing, a bad thing…or just a thing?”
Yes.
Pamela Slim
March 2nd, 2009 1:00 am
oops – of course I meant to say good to see you at “Problogger.” :)
Connie Bensen
March 2nd, 2009 1:01 am
Have you been stalking me?! LOL
I’ve blogged a few times about this. In my case I’m an empty nester (not that that makes it any better for my husband). But I have thought about it.
I really don’t think it’s limited to the online world. When I took my job at the library in an admin role I worked 7 days a week & put in long hours for the first 2 or so years. I did the same when I started teaching in the career before that, so it’s how I’m wired.
I’ve been online 2 yrs investing in providing others with resources. I have noticed that I can cut back on my blogging & the only thing it affects is # of visitors to my blog. I don’t depend on my blog for monetization tho.
Stephen - Rat Race Trap
March 2nd, 2009 1:03 am
Jonathan, “Is social media the new Crackberry?”
Great insight. I think you are right on target with this. Really nice article. I am really interested in seeing how all this plays out over the next few years.
Connie Bensen
March 2nd, 2009 1:03 am
additional thoughts –
when I am events – I go black online. I value that face to face time. When I’m talking to someone in person & they start clicking on their device – I quit talking (because they’re attention is somewhere else).
kelli Busey
March 2nd, 2009 1:03 am
Published that comment prematurely. Yes it is definitely a big part of my life. It is one out lite for advocacy thats available 24/7.
Nice advertising. Actually attractive and loads fast. Does the publisher retain control over the ad content?
Stacy
March 2nd, 2009 1:11 am
Great blog, on this early Sunday morning I really enjoyed reading your blog. I truely believe social media is just a part of ones’ life as moving forward. We have to keep up w/ the times or we will be so far left behind. Have a wonderful family breakfast, for me and my family, we will have a great breakfast. http://www.blufrogenergy.com/eaglinstacy Thank you, Stacy
Bai Zijian
March 2nd, 2009 1:11 am
I think that the blurring of such lines is almost inevitable, due to the reach of how social media is nowadays. It can be viewed both good and bad in almost a number of ways.
For example, most bloggers are leading mostly solitary lives and twitter makes it easy to connect with other users more easily. Not to mention via blogs too.
It may become bad in also a number of ways, such as the lack of human touch and contact. It really depends on how the person uses it rather than what type of blurring there is…..
Tumblemoose
March 2nd, 2009 1:28 am
Gotta keep the balance up.
You can have it all, you just have to manage it all. If you are someone who can do that, then great. If not, then one or the other (or more likely both) will suffer.
George
Patrick
March 2nd, 2009 1:28 am
I haven’t added Twitter to my phone yet, but I have access to e-mail, phone numbers from bloggers in my network, and other access. It seems like I’m always plugged in. It’s nice, in a way, because I stay up to date, but I’m also trying to cut it off to a certain degree. It’s nice to have family time and “me” time. And my wife and I are expecting our first child soon, so I know I will need to make some changes!
A.B.C. Photography
March 2nd, 2009 1:34 am
This is so true. Except for the “real friends” – I think I have the balance here. And if I’m with my family, then it’s them alone.
Still very true.
Cheers
Normand
March 2nd, 2009 1:34 am
Hi Darren,
I find your article of this morning very interesting. What exactly is happening with the advent of social media and the electronic devices that surround us. They are making time and space obsolete, in a way aren’t they?
Yet it is a question that is often on my mind. What is going on?
I am somewhat ‘old fashioned’ I think. I don’t have a cell phone for example and when I go on a forum I wonder where to go and what to do and who’s talking. Even trying to understand how to ‘relate’ on Twitter leaves me ‘wondering’.
Any way I have been a long time student’s of Marshall McLuhan. I find the ideas he was espousing, back in the day, very interesting and relevant to what is going down now.
He said that every media is an ‘extension’ of the body. For example clothes are an extension of the skin. And more relevant to the present discussion, electronic devices are an extension of the human nervous system. He further stated that we were now in the electronic age and everything was being re-tribalized.
The era of the “job” is gone and we are now into ‘roles’ of ‘total involvement’.
I think that is in fact what is happening.
If your interested there are quite a few clips of McLuhan on Utube. I was just watching this one before witting this response to your query. http://tinyurl.com/38pn85
The clip starts with this quote: Societies have always been shaped more by the nature of the media by which men communicate than by the content of the communication.
The question, for me is, what are we being turned into?
Have a great day.
I enjoyed your blog.
Norm
justin
March 2nd, 2009 1:38 am
Well, considering I read this post on my Blackjack II, from a link on tiny twitter while sitting with coworkers on a break…
I’d agree with the previous comments as far as finding a balance. I’m trying to achieve full time blogger status while still working a full time job and raise a family. So yeah, this one hits home. I’ve lost some sleep waking up early and sneaking out of bed before the wife and two year old misses me. Thinking I’ll do something productive, I sit down and … get sidetracked by my tweetstream.
It’s easy to do! I strive every day to keep the social media aspect to a minimum, yet I understand the necessity if you want to make it in this industry. (Do we call it that?) So I find the balance, and try to make the necessary time to participate without taking time away from my family.
The day job on the other hand…
cindy k
March 2nd, 2009 1:50 am
sometimes, i think we’re approaching going over the edge with our personal blog, although we’ve resisted twitter. one example is my husband likes to buy me flowers and now asks if i’ll put a picture on our blog. he used to like to just buy them for me. now i wonder if he likes the ‘publicity’ ;)?
everything we do just isn’t that interesting or photogenic and i find myself frustrated when we don’t have something new to say. is it ok to break the schedule when all the ”experts’ say you should post 3-5 times a week to keep readers interested? i’d like to say ‘yes’.
BloggerTinker
March 2nd, 2009 1:58 am
It really depends on how you manage IT. Most first time bloggers are really into IT. Specific example would be staring at the STATS. Some are also hardcore users of IT because they want their blog/site to grow. But really, IT depends…
Terry Heath
March 2nd, 2009 2:00 am
While I don’t find anything wrong with having online friends, and as Tumblemoose brings up you have to keep a balance, you made me think of something else related to boundaries.
For me the issue isn’t so much needing boundaries around my interaction with people online, it’s more about putting boundaries about the time I devote to the whole blog/social media thing. Again as Tumblemoose pointed out, it’s a matter of balance.
If your brick-and-mortar home (and those in it) are suffering from the time you spend online, then maybe you need to put up a time-management boundary.
Even if nobody else is suffering (you might live alone, etc) it’s healthy to make sure you’re not burning yourself out; that blinking computer monitor can serve as an IV for some.
Mark Dykeman
March 2nd, 2009 2:01 am
For the most part, I’m able to draw a pretty solid line between online and offline because very few people overlap between the two groups. Similarly, there’s also very little overlap between my day job and any social media activity. Moreover, since I have a cellphone that’s only used for special occasions, I don’t have the same interruptions on my offline time as other people.
By the same token, I can easily find several dozen acquaintances who are Twittering several times each waking hour, giving a running account of their day. There’s certainly a lot of overlap there between what might have been considered “unavailable” time but, let’s face it, it was the cellphone and pagers that really started a lot of people down the path of “always available”. Social media is just another set of steps along that journey.
Having said all that, I do think it’s healthy to put some kind of barriers or limits on “on line time” so that it doesn’t disrupt the other, more important parts of life.
Jonathan Fields
March 2nd, 2009 2:12 am
Hey everyone,
Thanks for all the quick and insightful comments. It’s funny, while writing the post, I literally kept going back and forth about how I felt about the blurring of the lines. In fact, I’m sitting here writing this comment as a quick burst of social media juice, while my daughter is doing her own thing on a Sunday morning for a few minutes.
Is it work, is it play, does it matter?
The more I think about it, it’s less about labeling it work or play, it’s really just about the impact it’s having on your life and on your ability to be present and engaged.
Put another way, is it allowing you to connect with who and what matters most? Or, is it taking away?
That line can be so thin, it’s important, at least for me, to ask the question on a pretty regular basis and adjust along the way.
BloggieWoggieDoodle
March 2nd, 2009 2:12 am
I prefer the virtual world over the physical world.
That isn’t to say that I don’t tend well to the physical world; I do.
I don’t like face2face interaction. I never have. I never have and I doubt I ever will.
Here’s something to stoke a little discussion: I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with that attitude and I don’t see anything unhealthy about it especially since I get outside several times a week and take good care of the home front.
Anyone else have similar feelings or does anyone think I “need help”?
Rahul Jadhav
March 2nd, 2009 3:03 am
It is important to understand that family is also important. I agree that the blog is also important but family always comes before blogging. People should realize that
Nate Smith
March 2nd, 2009 3:23 am
The beginning of this article freaked me out. I don’t have kids, but it is sunday morning and I did get up before my wife woke up so I could work on my blog. And then I was sitting on the toilet when I starting reading this post on my trusty iPhone.
My goal (and I say goal because I don’t always live up to it) is to spend focused time on everything I do. When I am with my wife or friends in person, I focus on being with them in the moment. And then I spend focused time working on my blog, checking stats, and using social media. The key is that I have to actually book out the time for those activities so that they get done, and then be disciplined enough not to work on them until it is time to.
ZK@Internet Marketing Blog
March 2nd, 2009 3:46 am
For me I am playing two roles, I am doing blogging because I love it and with that I am also having day time job as well. I am a workaholic guy and works always motivates me :)
I am still not having such kind of life, but yeah its fun to have such.
Toma Bonciu - SEO Services
March 2nd, 2009 3:53 am
Hi,
I think social media has offered us the ability to connect with people that have the same beliefs or the same interests or read the same blogs or watch the same movies or listen to the same music.
Ans many times we don’t encounter in real life people that are interested by the same things as we are. And we need someone to exchange ideas and thoughts … someone who listens and understands what are we talking about. And in many cases social networks gives us this opportunity … and I think we should take it.
Now, if this is a good thing or a bad thing I don’t know. Time will tell. If we should spend less time checking our e-mail or friending up on some social network : depends on what each individual wants. We are free now to communicate and express our feelings and share our knowledge.
Thanks,
@TomaBonciu
Ganesh
March 2nd, 2009 4:10 am
My personal motivation for facing this exact blurring of lines between blogging world and real world is – Give the present to your family.
Postpone your passion, addiction, business, work or whatever you call it. It could wait.
Give the present to you kid handing over her doll and play with her. That moment won’t come back.
A comment could be scapped any time and no one bothers in the mayhem of billion blogs and zillion comments.
If you set aside some logical/humanly possible hours for work be it research/blogging anything…. It is the best solution is what I feel. At the end, a blog alone won’t speak who you really are.
In the race for maintaing brand identity, we shouldn’t lose identity :)
Marmalade Moon | Kate
March 2nd, 2009 4:49 am
What an interesting and thought-provocing article!
I think one of the reasons that a lot of internet activities are so compelling is that they give us measurable and instant feedback. How many “friends” or “followers have we got, how many people read our last blog post or made a comment. The numbers can make us feel like we are improving – something – ourselves… We get some kind of quantifiable result from our social media that we don’t get with “real friends” and family.
I think the technologically-driven blurring of the lines between work and play and time is a very interesting question too! It does allow us to always be doing something. But why are we “cranking out work”, being super efficient, always checking, doing, commenting, connecting, texting? Isn’t the point in being effective that we reach a point when we are done for the day, and – then what? We work so that – what? What is the reward? Or are we working for the sake of working? Or are we connecting to feel that we are seen, or noticed, to feel that we exist? “I am who I know, or how many followers I have”, rather than “I am what I buy”?
If the internet basically is one’s digital working environment, perhaps the only way to not be working, is to turn it off when one has spare time. Also in order to not burn out.
On the one hand, the blurred lines between work and play can seem like a huge freedom. Ohhh – I can sit at a café and write! I can work any hours I like. I can check my Tweets on my iPhone. But if I find myself working much more than in a traditional setting, I have to ask myself if all these micro breaks on my social media that all in all prolong my work day by – lets say – four hours, really are what I want to do with my time.
The trouble is that one often doesn’t tend to plan how much time one wants to spend on these activities. Is it going to be one hour a day? One hour per week? Ten minutes per day? What feels like a reasonable amount of time?
For me, social media can be my digital break room, that I step into for a few minutes of fun, and then step out again. If I remind myself that that is what I want it to be.
Again, thanks for a great read!
Orna Ross
March 2nd, 2009 4:53 am
Hi Jonathon. Great post and really important question. I do know that the best way to live and work is to be wholehearted about what you’re doing, while you’re doing it. And that means giving the activity in hand mindful time and attention. (Not “just a quck check”…or “back in a sec”) Otherwise, yes, the boundaries blur to such a degree that you are never truly present for anything and life is slipping past while your head and heart is somewhere else. I’d guess we’ve all been there but definitely not the way to go.
PS it’s my observation that most pro bloggers (yes, including Darren) work far too hard. Cut yourselves a break, boys. We’ll still follow you. :).
Melissa - Mindful Construct
March 2nd, 2009 5:02 am
This is a great post Jonathan. I think that we need more reflection on the psychology of using social media and new web applications to “enhance” our global presence, our careers, and our lives. Because we need to have boundaries if we want to succeed in the long-term.
The way I look at it is this: When I really need to write or create something, I have to shut out the rest of the world for the most part, and especially when I’m writing fiction. It’s just a matter of focus. When you immerse yourself in an inner world, you cannot be immersed in the thoughts, opinions, questions, or actions of others — unless you specifically need to refer to those to help your story/writing/project along and you do so consciously.
So when I’m using social media, my concentration is already fragmented to some extent; I have less of a boundary in place to help me write and create. (Even though I may be getting inspiration — to write about later.)
Now maybe for some people the multitasking works. But I bet most artists and writers even in our time — still create their best works in solitude.
If what Jonathan says about boundaries resonates with you, I recommend reading the article called, “The End of Solitude” by William Deresiewicz, which is a much needed look at how solitude is becoming more obsolete in an increasingly connected world.
Brad
March 2nd, 2009 5:03 am
Yep, I’m guilty of this. I own an iPhone and aside from checking email when away from my desk, I’m also checking my blog stats, moderating comments and anything else I can do on that magic little device. The only thing I haven’t done with my iPhone yet is write a post. But I’m sure that’s not too far down the road!
Great post!
Angela Mills
March 2nd, 2009 5:04 am
Funny, I just read an article this morning on Christianity Today’s site saying that many people are going on a “Facebook fast” for lent! Apparently giving up facebook is more of a sacrifce than living without food…interesting! Great post, very funny and yet sad.
kris
March 2nd, 2009 5:08 am
I agree that blogging can become distracting from the truly important things in life. Life is too short to become obsessed with any one thing at the expense of truly living. Yesterday my blog tracker website was down and I went snow shoeing in rocky mountain national park at bear lake. It was magical and I was able to put my life into perspective. life is a continual balancing act and I am trying integrate blogging into it without letting it define my life. I have too many other interests to let that happen. But I do have a constantly renewed hope that blogging and internet networking in general will usher in a new age of rapidly diffusable wisdom and public consciousness and maybe even a new Renaissance of art and culture through this New Media. In this hope we have started a competition with a $100 cash prize on our humble blog. Anyone can show off their posting talents see this post for details. http://www.tompainesghost.com/2009/02/post-with-most-on-tom-paines-ghost_23.html
~K
Lee, Blogger's Workshop
March 2nd, 2009 5:24 am
I guess I’m one of the few who doesn’t carry an iPhone. I recognize my need for separation, and realize that if I had socail media at my disposal 24/7, my wife would be even less thrilled with my career as an internet marketer.
It’s nice to be able to put it aside now and again to reconnect with the “real” world.
Tony Murphy
March 2nd, 2009 5:47 am
Hi,
I think it is real important to have clear boundaries between work and family. Otherwise its hard to focus.
I don’t blog at tt weekend as thats family time. I do blog at odd hours during the week but that fits in with what I am doing usually.
Social media is great, but it can waste a lot of your time and if you are building a business you must be able to focus otherwise you will never succeed :-(
Good talking point – eek its Sunday, I shoulden’t be doing this :-)
cheers
Tony
Chad Levitt
March 2nd, 2009 6:20 am
Yes, your post aptly points out the negative side effects that social media, blogging, and smart phones can bring into your life. But, as with anything setting boundaries is key, although the boundaries can get quite blury these days. Who hasn’t been guilty of checking their blog for comments or responding to DM’s when they should have been paying attention to something else.
As long as the quality of the relationships with the one’s you care about is unaffected you will experience mostly positive benefits from the blogosphere/social media.
Brian Benton
March 2nd, 2009 6:37 am
Nothing is “bad” until you make it that way. When that “thing”, an object, a person, an event, or an activity becomes your main focus in life, then you should be concerned. If your life lives to fulfill the needs of that thing, then it is bad, especially if others are hurt and sacrificed for it. Obviously some things are ok to serve, like your family, and your job to a certain extent. When you plan dinner with your wife and kids around checking your blog stats, or when you can’t get through dinner without tweeting, you’re in trouble. Otherwise, have it.
Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach
March 2nd, 2009 7:52 am
Excellent topic.
I have definitive boundaries when I’m in both work mode and family mode. After 5pm, for example, I generally shut down my work-mind and call the kids to the family room to watch TV/cuddle/walk the mooses etc. And ideally Tuesdays and Friday is Me time for karate sparring and all-around relaxing.
Boundaries…very important things indeed.
Data points, Barbara
Michael Bungartz
March 2nd, 2009 8:32 am
As with everything in life, we must remind ourselves to seek balance. A task much easier said than done.
On one hand, blogging and social media enable us to connect and contribute while being mobile. For many of us that use these mediums for work, this can allow us to work from your home office while watching the kids or from half-way around the world sitting on the beach in the Mediterranean. But on the other hand, too much time spent ‘plugged in’ can begin to take away from the core relationships that make life worth living (family).
I think Mr. Fields above poses the right question: “…it’s less about labeling it work or play, it’s really just about the impact it’s having on your life and on your ability to be present and engaged.” That said, I think scheduling time for both, as well as allowing a little flexibility for spontaneity, is the way forward.
And remember, as Timothy Ferriss puts it; “Schedule your life well in advance of when you actually want to live it.”
Regards, Michael
Sunny Jamiel
March 2nd, 2009 9:27 am
I think its only natural. We are living in more fluid times. Boundries are shrinkings and our reach expanding.
Harry
March 2nd, 2009 9:34 am
I must agree with Connie about people clicking while talking. I, also, withdraw until I have a chance to compete with the Crackberry.
The always connected social media phenomenon has actually resulted in a decrease in face-to-face social skills. I’ve lost track of the times I’ve watched “under the table” texting during a presentation and I’ve actually walked out of a presentation after the second attendee answered her phone while I was trying to help them focus their marketing efforts. I apologized and offered the opportunity to reschedule when I could have their undivided attention.
The boundaries ARE blurred when you allow your connectivity to interfere with “real time” face time with another human being, whether family, friend or business associate.
Brad Owens
March 2nd, 2009 11:15 am
I think it is a double edged sword. On the one hand, it creates the instant ability to do work and connect with your clients/coworkers. On the other hand, it creates a society based on instant gratification. That causes problems for any service provider that doesn’t respond near instantly to users’ requests. That makes it difficult for us (the service providers) to break away and actually have a “day off”. I’ve just started getting into the social media consulting business and I’m already finding out that i need to be on call for most of the time. I guess when I try to take my first real vacation this summer, I’ll find out how it affects business.
GossipSecretaries
March 2nd, 2009 11:16 am
Being a new blogger, working on building your blog can sometimes take over. Being an active participant on social networking sites and other networks can sometimes consume you and it become difficult to sometimes just “turn off.” But, I am learning how to do just that.
Onna
March 2nd, 2009 12:41 pm
I contemplate this often myself!! Between my iphone, laptop and imac I am always digitally connected. I have noticed my older son commenting on how much I love my computer! I have begun to wonder if I should give myself time lines each day when I can and can’t work on my blogging/online work!! I get so absorbed sometimes the day dissappears!! This didn’t happen when I was just working online without trying to blog and network and rank!! It’s like a whole new world I am learning, but I think it does pull me in and get to consuming!!
Mario
March 2nd, 2009 1:14 pm
It’s not bad or good. It just is.
Personally I think it’s great. Indeed I call some of my online fellows friends and sometimes it feels like I know them better than some of my offline friends.
It tears down boundaries between people and cultures and enriches our lives. I think it makes this world a better place.
Of course there will ever be people who will use it in a negative way, but that is with everything in life. Even a ball pen can be a deadly weapon in the wrong hands.
So, just enjoy it.
Robby G
March 2nd, 2009 2:29 pm
Enjoyed it thanks.
Monique Rio
March 2nd, 2009 2:30 pm
If social media is being used as an escape from real-life relationships or as a way to feel productive, then yes, in excess it’s a problem. But if you can honestly say you’re doing it for reasons in tune with what you value, then whether or not you’re blurring the boundaries between work and play is besides the point.
When you’re living your passion, work and play are inherently blurred. Your work is your play. It’s like asking whether or not your playing soccer on Saturdays is taking away from your musical pursuits. It’s a very very different way of looking at the work / personal life balance issue.
The better question to ask is, “Are any of things I value being neglected because of something I’m doing?” And then, “What can I do about it?” If you don’t value face to face interaction, there’s little reason to change your behavior.
A Lee
March 2nd, 2009 4:56 pm
You made me LAUGH! Yes, I know someone just like it…. I’m living with ‘m….. ha ha… Thank goodness, I can pull him away from that computer for enough times in the day to keep his health up!
Pushan Banerjee
March 2nd, 2009 5:30 pm
I agree. Social media marketing has made us plain lazy! I see people who sit on Twitter for hours trying to grow followers. Tweeps come at a flash. Yet, I feel for the regular tweeple. When does he/she go out and meet friends. If the trend continues, I believe the answer is never. Cause he hardly has time to catch up with reality, as he might miss that @reply.
Web Design Bangkok
March 2nd, 2009 7:16 pm
I suppose it all depends on why you find the need to blog. Skipping breakfast and the kids just for the “sake of blogging”, then, I agree, you have blurred the lines, but if it is important to your business that you regularly write then I really don’t see that any lines have been crossed at all; it may just seem that way.
Viraal
March 2nd, 2009 7:16 pm
I guess the world of social media has created a lot more harm then good.Beyond a certain extent it tends to spoil your own personal family relations. I have been constantly nagged by my wife on not being able to give enough time to her after I have started blogging. But the fact is that to find good content to write requires quite a lot of thinking and reading which consumes a lot of one’s time. It might also affect one’s main source of bread and butter, especially those who don’t thrive on blogging for income.
The only way to beat this issue is to develop a group of like minded bloggers and do a group blogging by taking turns to blog. Maybe that could help. Also, at times ones mind gets saturated on what topic to blog about. Surely a team of professional bloggers could solve a lot of these issues.
PoLR
March 2nd, 2009 7:56 pm
Haha, this made me laugh. I see myself in your post, in my house we’re on a computer pretty much 24/7 and have been known to take one on holiday with us. For us, its part of our jobs and necessary but not only that – we enjoy it. We do have to make a conscious effort to close them down now and again though but no more ‘conscious effort’ than many of our family need to turn of fthe TV!
Incidentally, the computer on holiday was to take digital photos off my camera. That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it (although we did end up blogging from Australia)!
Sam
March 2nd, 2009 9:00 pm
I liked this article it is something that comes up in our house a bit, my partner does not like me checking things like this all the time, saying I am becoming adictive and I can see the point. But with so many different time zones you need to be fairly flexible with your approach. I think finding something that works for you and your family – i.e. having that balance between home and work.
Infonote
March 2nd, 2009 10:28 pm
I am avoiding a smartphone for the exact same reason you are mentioning. I am not a full-time blogger, however when I am outside I try to avoid computers
lulugal11
March 2nd, 2009 10:39 pm
I think we have gone beyond blurring. Every day I turn on my computer as soon as I get out of bed….and up pops my blog and facebook.
I get annoyed at friends and family who do not know what is going on …..because I know I just posted to the blog…..wait everyone does NOT read the blog.
I think I start to have withdrawal symptoms if I cannot check my feeds to see what everyone else is writing.
Melody
March 3rd, 2009 12:05 am
This article made me smile. It’s validating to know I’m not alone!
Eric Young
March 3rd, 2009 12:18 am
Really enjoyed it
dp
March 3rd, 2009 12:22 am
Clearly social media is a great step forward for those who cannot leave their home, it can be their lifeline. However there is a need to keep the balance otherwise it could end up all work and no play.
Brandy
March 3rd, 2009 12:23 am
I must admit I have a blur between social networking, family and blogging. My day takes over me, I am not in charge of my day…which I really need to get figured out, because I need to have “productive” days not days that take over me! great post!!
Tony
March 3rd, 2009 12:34 am
Sunday? Day of rest?
Does your PC / laptop / iphone (I use my trusty Palm to keep up wireless with mails !)
We have a rule that Sunday has PCs turned off (unless there is very urgent homework to do)
It does go for helping some family conversation, tho’ I confess we often spend time on the other screen (remember the t.v.?) !!
Best wishes, great topic :-)
P.S. I think the Twitter thing has got a bit out of hand… bandwagons come and go, but we maybe we need to discern what is most valuable, enriching and constructive.
Tracy
March 3rd, 2009 12:34 am
Great post, it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. I have been making a conscious effort to be more in the moment and not let my blogging and social media take over other aspects of my life.
“It can wait” is my new mantra and it’s made me less anxious and feeling more content. The great thing is, not being on at all times has had not hurt my productivity at all.
Tony
March 3rd, 2009 12:35 am
p.s. would like to keep in touch with comments!
Joyful Alternative
March 3rd, 2009 12:39 am
Five years ago, I married a guy I met on a political blog, so you could say I merged my online and off-line lives.
Chris
March 3rd, 2009 1:22 am
I only publish on Monday’s and try to keep stuff pre-written so all that I have to due is publish. I really wish I had the scheduled publishing on GoDaddy. I do not work on my blog unless the family is out or are sleeping. It is very easy to let it get in the way…I avoid Facebook, Twitter and the other social networking sites…just eats more of my time.
timtipper
March 3rd, 2009 1:54 am
Social media provides an element of “community” you can’t get otherwise.
The ability to edit your interaction with others.
~ If you don’t want to respond to someone, it isn’t necessary.
~ Your comment can be combed over, thought through, edited for maximum impact and….. then send it.
~ You can communicate even when in the powder room (that’s addiction)
~ You can block/allow anyone you want
~ You can just unplug if you want to
Social media provides two needs at the same time, community and privacy.
Just don’t let it rule your life. Hold on while I towel off.
Make Money Online Tips
March 3rd, 2009 2:43 am
Technology has made it quite bad, all work and play are centered on tech.
Joseph
March 3rd, 2009 3:01 am
Personally, there is no line between my online life and my offline. I speak to family members themselves online as much as I do off. I also think that my generation much prefers IMing to phone calls. At least my friends do. How much more fun is it to have 4 or 5 or MORE conversations going on the computer than it is to have one going on the phone. Sure, there is three way calling, but all three ways are messy and awkward.
I’m not saying I don’t get out an live my life, but the virtual world is a big part of my life. It gives me a lot of freedom, and has turned me into something I’ve always wanted to be – the eternal student.
Barbara Segal
March 3rd, 2009 4:32 am
Amazingly sad! One will never have real results without human touch, contact, and person to person contact. There will always be introverts in life and extroverts. Introverts are wired differently than extroverts. There’s nothing “wrong” with them. They just become energized through different processes depending on where the majority of their brain activity takes place.
Now we have to tell everyone what we are doing it, when we are doing it, where we are doing it and why we are doing it.
The follow me Twitter can be an additive and a BIG TIME sucker! Each one of these new Internet tools is like a Hot new Night Club, here today gone tomorrow, and then replaced with something else. Try giving it up and have a meaningful communication. Somewhere along the Internet highway, we fell under the spell that more communication is better communication. Sometimes more communication is just noise.
Dean Saliba
March 3rd, 2009 5:40 am
I don’t have a family so it does not get in my way. :P
Terry
March 3rd, 2009 6:55 am
Thanks for the timely post!
Would love to read how successful bloggers manage to write and promote and still make time for real life.
Sierra Friend
March 3rd, 2009 8:32 am
Great post!
In my past life (Pre-Self Employment) I fell victim to a life without balance- and the consequences of always being plugged into my business took a heavy toll both personally and professionally. I learned LONG ago, that no business relationship is more important than the one I have with myself and my loved ones.
Period.
I love Social Media as much as the next guy, AND I also feel that everything in life must be experienced in moderation. Yet, moderating Social Media is a difficult task. During the day it can be considered “working/networking” and during our times off it can be considered “connecting/interacting”, and before we know it, we’ve spent more face time with our “Friend’s List” than we have with our spouse, children or in-person friends.
An important question to ask ourselves no matter the vice:
- Is this interfering with other parts of my life/Are other parts of my life suffering because of this?
The tricky part is pulling ourselves away from the computer long enough to take inventory on the state of affairs in the rest of our life, and to be willing to answer that question honestly.
ed
March 3rd, 2009 8:35 am
Balance with anything is important. Some stay at the office too long and others never make it out of bed. Sometimes we gotta know when to flip of the power button and step outdoors.
pm
March 3rd, 2009 8:47 am
Lines can get blurred if we ignore the importance of human interaction. Social media is wonderful for re-connecting so long as we don’t lose our established (human) connections at the same time.
gweipo
March 3rd, 2009 9:23 am
yup, that describes me, in the first sentence. But I try to maintain at least as many physical friends as online friends. The economist this week had an interesting article on the Dunbar number
http://www.economist.com/science/displaystory.cfm?story_id=13176775&CFID=43865614&CFTOKEN=45335620
turns out the virtual world isn’t that different from the physical world.
Amie
March 3rd, 2009 9:37 am
I can’t speak for others…but for myself I think that being able to work in short bursts and check in for a moment is great. I am able to work for a while…but I can always get up and take care of my family or my other obligations and know that most of my business tasks can be done 24-7 in small bursts.
krissy knox
March 3rd, 2009 10:00 am
Card carrying member here. Blog and/or tweet, (try to do both) 7 days a week. But not the iphone thing. I’d say available everyday, but try to cut down on Sundays (way down — it’s my time to spend with God in a greater way, and with family).
Is having so much access to a computer (and to work) a good thing, or is it a bad thing? I think it depends on the blogger and his/her ability to actually have boundaries — one of those boundaries being not allowing work cut into his time w/ his family. In other words, even in the blogging world you can maintain balance — set boundaries, have rules and guidelines. You must have good time management. You must decide when you will work, when you’ll stop to eat, when you’ll eat with the family, how late you’re willing to stay up, etc. You also need to decide when you will spend time with your family giving them undivided attention.
When one has established these basic types of guidelines, and knows pretty well what his boundaries are, he should be able to have a happy family life. It even enables some to work at home who would never have had that chance, and would now be taking their children off to babysitter.
So having access to today’s technology and the ability to work at home is actually a good thing. For example, one can actually be closer to his/her family if he blogs at home, b/c he can spend more time with his family.
Again, it’s all if one has well set out guidelines for himself. And whether one has the willingness and ability to stick to the guidelines of a healthy lifestyle for himself and for his family.
So yes, I’d say if you’re disciplined, the technology of today is a plus! If you don’t discipline yoursef, and are without guidelines, you make many around you sad because you are not participating in the life that is going on right around you. So in the end, it depends on the individual, and how he handles his freedoms.
krissy knox :)
my main blog: Sometimes I Think
Follow me on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/iamkrissy
StuffCooksWant
March 3rd, 2009 10:39 am
The blurring of lines between work and play… well, you know, sometimes I think it’s the most efficient way for me to work, but then I really do get sucked in checking this and that and responding to “just this one comment” really quickly. Before I know it, an hour has gone by and my son is still waiting, ever so patiently, for his snack.
I have recently made a vow to myself that I will turn off the computer when the guys come home from school and not check anything until they go to bed.
My 10-year old son really hit home when he said, in response to my question about a poor homework grade, “Well, I was going to ask you for help with my homework, but you’re always on your computer.” Ouch.
Kellie
March 3rd, 2009 11:33 am
I am just now learning to feed the addiction that is social networking. I’m a new blogger, new to twitter as well as facebook and I had to laugh as I read this post because I overheard my son tell his sister who is away in college yesterday that I must have been ill because I hadn’t been on the computer all day! I will be a bit more cognizant about the blurring lines and try to keep the “crackberry” from becoming an addiction that completely overtakes me. As far as killing the human connections, I would beg to differ. I’ve been found by childhood friends as well as high school buds and we’re all planning a gathering now. Social networking has its place and can enhance human interaction if it is used properly.
frugalgrad
March 3rd, 2009 12:52 pm
Social media was first initiated to connect people and enable people around the world together without being constraint in a fixed place or time or even meet face to face. But now, in my opinion, this kind of connection is somewhat overextended that it becomes to have reverse effects. I wanted to be available 24/7 to connect with friends with now I just want take some time for myself to connect with real people. I am wondering if social media began to fall into McLuhand’s tetrad in which a technology can pass 4 stages: enhance, obsolete, retrieve, and reverse. If the need to social media starts to bring more irritation and inconvenience to our life, may be it’s on the reversal stage. If it is, then may be we will go back to simpler time or develop a new technology and the cycle will begin again. Hm, what would be more convenient and better than instant social media? (if there is not, then technology evolution may seem to reach a halt.., but what do I know about this, I am just a normal non-technie grad…)
Tyrone
March 3rd, 2009 10:35 pm
It’s really a great post, I think everything in life have importance but according to its priority.
Royalbloggers
March 4th, 2009 12:10 am
Great post. It high time for us to separate out virtual life from real life and vise versa. Many time it occurred like this :- we bloggers get up in the morning.. start blogging and spend longs hours in front of computer. and when get up from the front of the monitor , it high time to go to the bed…..Life seems….
Pet Lizards
March 4th, 2009 5:36 pm
Several years ago I used to play MU*s online (google muds) and I discovered that I was having trouble differentiating between real life and the game. I’d literally get up at 4am and play until 10pm. This went on for about 3 years and those are three years that are gone. Poof! I’ll never see them again. I lost a great girlfriend, and several close friends over it. I was entirely blind to what was happening. In fact it wasn’t until nearly 10 years later that I look back and have an “ah ha” type of moment.
I mention this because I’ve lately found the same thing happening with social networking. The worst thing about it is that I’m not networking. I’m not the type of personality who “networks”, I’m just wasting time in front of the computer. Example: I have 5 blogs and I spend more time writing comments on other people’s blogs than on developing my own.
Tony
March 5th, 2009 11:10 am
Hi “pet lizards” (yes, I did pop in to your blog there… that sure is a “niche market!”
Sounds like you are getting near (if not already) on the addiction trail…
It is quite easy to spend hours on end in front of the PC and lose track of time (and people, and yourself which is the bigger danger…) I know, I have been there…
We need to find a healthy balance and know when to SIGN OFF (I am after writing this to you!)
You may find it usefukl to talk to someone you trust about this, or perhaps talk to your doctor, because this is becoming an international EPIDEMIC.
Best wishes.
Tony
Colleen
March 12th, 2009 5:57 am
Darren,
I am just beginning to consider a blog and am getting familiar with the social networks. But I must say, your post is exactly what I would expect from a man.
I say this with great respect and a smile. Men tend to compartmentalize their lives. For women there is no separation between one aspect of their lives and another. All this multiple lines of communication is the kind of thing women do naturally. Unless we are being very focused in a task or career we experience the blurring of lines as the way life is.
So your question may come from moving into that world in a way you haven’t before. A blurring of your world lines as a masculine person. And this is probably a sign that you are expanding as a person, something I would consider a good thing.
And, I see there is also the potential to go too far with anything.
Wish me luck in discovering this for myself!
Colleen
Comments will be closed off on this post 90 days after it is published. Apologies to those this impacts but it's a regrettable and temporary measure to combat a growing comment spam problem. See our most recent posts where you can comment here.