I actually think she and i accomplished just that recently, we disagreed , stated our positions and we are still friends, it could happen people , it could happen

You can’t be afraid of striking that nerve in people, especially if you are speaking (or blogging) the truth. But even in things that you may need to learn – negative comments can be helpful.

It’s the beauty of opinion – if we all had the same opinion, none of us would grow. As Darren said, those negative comments can make you grow as a writer, too – but sometimes you have to be willing to listen to what the comment is really saying in order to grow.

Fueding is a great way to build traffic!

Not long ago I received a bunch of negative attacks on a story I had written about an experience I had in aviation (I’m a deaf pilot – yes DEAF, believe it or not). 99 percent of them included name-calling and other put downs. Are you saying those should be allowed? If so, I disagree.

However, I do agree that having dissenting comments, if provided respectfully, is GREAT. The question is, how do you encourage this?

If a dissenter is really being rude after a while they’ll settle down and realize you’re not playing ball. But you have to refrain from getting in the pigpen.

On the other hand, a good disenting point migth help you view your point from a different angle. Maybe even change your mind.

If wouldn’t mind a dissenter. I just don’t have any readers….

The annoying bit is when someone comes in and reads about every tenth word, then posts a criticism of what you didn’t say.

I will say, I’m actually amazed at how civil 99.9% of blog commenters are. I came from The WELL, which is a very tough, very unforgiving environment. The blogosphere is a bunch of lovable kittens in comparison. :)

Me personally, i will approve negative comments, but if they make things personal, use swear words etc, i think you have every right as a blogger to keep your site clean, and to deny such comments.

Thats just how i see it.

I’m sure you should delete most of them, but every now and then you might let one through and have some fun with them, like:

“Yumm.. burnt dead stuff definitely is appealing! And who cares about health: you’re going to die anyway, right? “

I really enjoy blogging – but more as a hobby. And the mutual back-slapping that goes on is quite nice.

But maybe I’m not alone in thinking “there must be more to it than that”.

It’s kind of an unsated hunger for more, but lacks a clear definition of that lack.

And I think this one word defines it – DEBATE. Not ranting at each other that you get in some blogs. Although some of that can be fun, it’s more entertainment than anything with real substance.

Probably in the category of humour.

Debate has disagreement in its foundation stones. And a lively debate is like a conversation you’d have with your mates down the pub.

It’s pretty dull if you completely agree on everything. It’s good to have your own opinion endorsed, but much more fun when you disagree. Unless of course you get sloshed and end up in a fist-fight at the end of the night (which I haven’t done [yet]).

Apologies in advance for this next bit. I only know of “problogger” via Cath Lawson. And I may have been here before, but not regularly.

But I don’t know where you are from unless I navigate away from this comment and lose the momentum.

But I’m from Liverpool in the UK. Home fo the Beatles. And in many corners (but not all) of the globe famour for football or rather soccer as it’s referred to elsewhere.

There are two soccer teams, Everton and Liverpool FC (Football Club).

To find agreement between two opposing supporters is as rare as having a disagreement with a Dodo in the local pub.

But to have an agressive argument is equally as rare.

It’s good-humoured but rational debate with disagreement as the under-pinning foundation.

It’s healthy. It’s fun. And as an Everton supporter, long in the shadow of the success of Liverpool, right now, we’re enjoying the debates now even more.

For years, Everton have been in Liverpool’s shadow. And that has developed some incredibly creative debates from the Everton side – i.e. how can we salvage some pride and point out differences between the two when there is little foundation?

Right now, Everton are doing amazingly well, sitting above our rivals in the league despite a lack of investment of tens of millions that our arch-rivals have enjoyed.

And this article made me think. Should I stop the back-slapping? Should I ask the 3 or so regular readers of my blog to stop being polite and disagree?

And the answer is “YES”.

But then again, to enter into the spirit of THIS debate, a counter-argument which shows you are talking a load of dung could easily be put forward.

Especially as I’m a creative Evertonian, seasoned in disagreeing without real foundation.

But I’ll leave that for another day…

There is a difference between a disagreement and an attack … and what I quickly learned is that you need to know your audience, especially when they have no sense of humor at all!